Saying It In Silence

In the spirit of meaningful connections…

One day I accidentally took it to the next level by not using words.

Through the window I watched as a lady and a man walked up the step to my favorite local coffee shop, Jitter Beans. Not sure why, but in the moment of making eye contact with the lady I decided to hold the eye contact longer than usual. Not creepy long, probably realistically just a second or two longer. I had a slight smile on my face when I did it. Suddenly her friendly enough, but largely expressionless, face broke into a beautiful meaningful smile that lit up her being and she waved hello to me as if she knew me.

I smiled back at her with easy effort right from my soul and I thought “wow, that’s how easy it can be.” A meaningful connection. And without words to boot! It felt wonderful and simple and we both felt it and we recognized the awareness of it in each other.

I realized how holding a gaze for just a fraction of a second longer shows people you care enough to do it; to see them. Makes them feel that they are worth your attention, your energy, your presence.

It reminded me of my experience at the Sundance in Fort McLeod 7 years ago. I chose a spot within the round arbor that found me next to a lady from Spain. Her husband was one of the elders leading and dancing. I didn’t speak Spanish and she didn’t speak English so our interactions were relatively limited.

But we shared smiles and sat next each other and danced our prayers together. At the end of the last day, the 4th day, she put her hand on her heart and the other on mine and in stumbling English said “sisters”. I smiled and nodded “yes”. We had been through things inside ourselves alongside each other - alone together. And it was better than words.

This makes me understand a little bit more my relationships with my favorite trees. When all you have is the feeling.